


It Takes A Village

by BlueKillers



Category: Fargo (2014)
Genre: Adoption, Grumpy Numbers, M/M, New Family, Parent AU, Stubborn Wrench, The Perfect Headcanon
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-07-28
Updated: 2014-07-28
Packaged: 2018-02-10 17:55:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,626
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2034537
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BlueKillers/pseuds/BlueKillers
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's just a regular Sunday afternoon. The sky's a bit cloudy, Mr. Numbers and Mr. Wrench had eggs and bacon for breakfast, they just finished a job for Fargo. Everything is perfect.<br/>Except for the fact that someone left a baby outside their door.<br/>And Mr. Wrench refuses to give her up.</p>
            </blockquote>





	It Takes A Village

**Author's Note:**

  * For [sweetalec](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=sweetalec), [orphanhooligan](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=orphanhooligan).



> Inspired by this post: http://sweetalec.tumblr.com/post/93033247831/imagine-someone-leaving-a-baby-or-a-puppy-in-front-of and everything that tumbled out of it.

Numbers woke up to the sound of birds chirping, and the sizzling of something in a pan. He smiled to himself, snuggling into the sheets just a little more before sitting up. Last night had been quite the journey, going from California back to Nebraska in one whole drive. At least the job was finished, and at least he was back in his soft bed again. Numbers yawned, scratching his beard as he stood. He searched for some pants and made his way to the kitchen.

He saw his partner at the stove, cooking something for the first time in a while. It was most likely bacon because of the smell, but he never knew with Wrench. He smiled, coming up behind Wrench and snaking his arms around him. He laid his head on his back, sighing happily. It was nice living like this. They didn't have any neighbors that really bothered them. Their house was almost completely surrounded by fields of corn. Everything was perfect in that moment.

"How do you want your eggs?" Wrench said aloud. He very rarely spoke out loud, only when they were truly alone. Numbers smiled, sticking his hands out and signing 'scrambled, with pepper and mozzarella." Then he went to make his coffee.

They didn't often have these calm mornings together. It was a nice change from all the murder they had committed. They coffee brewed itself as Numbers went to the fridge. He got out his creamer and the cheese for the eggs. He tossed the cheese to Wrench, which he caught easily, and then went back to work. The coffee took several minutes, and when is finished Numbers added his hazelnut creamer. He poured a cup for Wrench, without creamer but with two sugars, and sat down at their small dining table. Wrench soon came in with bacon and eggs, and they sat down for their morning meal.

'Did you sleep well? I know it's hard for you to sleep when you don't drive,' Numbers signed, picking up his silverware.

'It was better than usual. I missed sleeping in that bed.'

'Aren't you happy I suggested getting a new one?' Numbers smirked at Wrench and was returned with a pair of rolled eyes. He knew that Wrench liked it though and was glad that he had given a worthy anniversary present. Numbers could clearly remember that night though. He almost received a concussion from being smacked against the headboard.

Their breakfast was soon finished, and Numbers cleaned the dishes just to be fair. Mr. Wrench, on the other hand, went into the family room and turned on the TV, finding his favorite spot on their couch. He flipped through the channels for about ten minutes before finding a show about food, and Numbers made his way in. He snuggled up to Wrench on the couch, laying on his chest. Wrench put his arm around him, kissing the top of his head. Nothing could have ruined this moment. Nothing at-

There was a ring. The doorbell, o be precise. Numbers groaned and signed 'Someone's at the door.' He stood, grabbing a t-shirt from their bedroom before heading towards the door. He opened it, staring at nothing for a while, wondering who could have rang the bell. Then he heard a whimper, a tiny little sound that could have only been one thing. He looked down.

"Shit."

A baby. It could have been anything in the world, a bomb, a head, any kind of threat. But no, it had to be a child sitting in a cardboard box with a blanket over itself. Damn, he wished it was a head instead. He grabbed his shoes quickly and stepped out of the house, careful around the baby. Walking out to the edge of the driveway he looked down the dirt road. He look for a sign that someone else had been there. This person obviously was ignorant, leaving tire tracks, some water had leaked out of the exhaust, and they drive away so fast that dirt was thrown into the air.

"Dammit. Damn all of it. Damn that person, damn that baby. I need a scotch," Numbers huffed as he walked back to the house. He grumbled as he picked up the box and as he walked into the house, slamming the door behind him. The baby whimpered some more as he walked into the family room and placed the box on the table in front of Wrench. He stared, turned off the TV and leaned close to the kid. He glanced up at Numbers.

'Don't look at me like it's my fault. It was on our doorstep. And we're gonna take it to an orphanage so get dressed.' He turned and made his way to the bedroom.

"Wait!" he yelled, standing abruptly. Numbers stopped and turned back to him. "We can't do that to her."

Numbers scrunched up his face towards Wrench. "That's a terrible idea. And how do you know it's a girl? We haven't even checked." 

"I can just tell, okay?" He sat back down, staring at the baby. He finally reverted back to sign language, 'If we send her to an orphanage, and one day she finds out that she was rejected twice, she'll get depressed. I could never do that.' Mr. Wrench picked up the baby, smiling at her.

Numbers groaned. He shouldn't have brought the baby inside. He should've gone back in to get his coat, and then driven to town by himself. Now Wrench was getting attached and he wouldn't let the damn kid go. He sighed and went back to the bedroom, putting on something that wasn't dirty. He came back out to see the baby in Wrench's lap, and him making silly faces. Numbers clenched his fists without thinking. Maybe he was jealous, but why should someone be jealous over a baby?

Wrench bent his knees and laid the baby so she could rest against them. This left his hands free. 'She's smiling at me.'

'Probably cause you're being an idiot.' He walked behind him to see the baby. She was, indeed, smiling. Numbers was now taking in all her features. She had brown hair, and tiny blue eyes. She didn't look too young, but at least six months old. Numbers put his hands in front of Wrench.

'We should take her to a doctor, to see if everything's okay.' Wrench tilted his head back and nodded.

'Should we take her now or later?'

'Now. I don't want to be here.'

~~~

They drove the mile to town and went to the doctor's office. Since it was Sunday they were only open for a few hours, and the two were lucky that they got there at a good time. Mr. Wrench held the child, very tenderly too, while Numbers filled out the stupid paperwork.

A nurse came out in her pink scrubs. "Sirs, you may come back now."

Numbers taped Wrench's shoulder and stood up. They walked back to one of the rooms and sat down on a small cheap couch that was across from the examination table. It took the doctor a good fifteen minutes to even walk into the room and introduce himself, which pissed Number's off to no end.

"Hello gentlemen. How are you doing today?"

"We're fine, thank you," Numbers answered. Of course Wrench didn't hear, nor did he care, because the baby was his top priority at the moment.

"So, what are we in for today?"

"Well," Numbers said, taking the baby away, "we, um, found this baby abandoned and we just wanted to bring it in to make sure everything's alright and that it's not sick."

"Well, that's very kind of you." The doctor smiled and took the child to the examination table. He took the temperature, looked in her ears and nose, and made sure everything was in order. "So, are you two brothers or something? Or just really close friends?"

Numbers couldn't hold back his blush, and Wrench smirked at him, squeezing his knee. Numbers pushed his hands away. "Um, yes. We are very close friends."

The doctor asked more useless questions as he checked out the baby, and he smiled when he was finished. "Nothing seem to be out of the ordinary. She's a healthy baby girl."

"About how old is she exactly?" Numbers asked.

"Around eight months. She's doing very well at this age. It's a good thing you two found her."

"Yeah, so um, what should we do with her now? Because, we're not really fit to be parents and our house isn't exactly 'baby friendly.'"

Wrench read his lips, frowned, punched his arm (not as hard as he could of course) and stood up, grabbing the baby. "Don't listen to him. We're keeping her," he said aloud, which caught both men off guard. He took a 20 dollar bill out of his pocket and slammed it on the table, storming out of the office. Numbers was shocked at first, and then chased after him. He found Wrench in the car, cradling the baby with fondness.

Numbers got into the drivers' seat. He watched Wrench make more strange faces at the baby. He finally got his attention, 'So you're making decisions now?'

Wrench glared. "Just get us home."

Numbers gave an angry look, mumbled a "fuck you", and started the car. The drive back was quiet like usual, but there was anger in the air. Numbers hated situations like this, but it came with the relationship. They were both stubborn people, which never mixed well, but Numbers cared so much for him and refused to be a coward when these things started.

They arrived home and entered the house, not even looking at each other. Wrench stopped in the hallway, turning back to Numbers. He signed 'sorry.'

Numbers smiled and signed, 'I love you', pulling him in for a quick kiss.

Just then the baby started whining, making the two men tense up incredibly. Numbers stared at her for a moment. 'I'll go get a blanket or something.' Wrench stood with the baby while a blanket was sought after, and when it was found the put both in the hallway floor. 'I really think we should take her somewhere else. Maybe we could give her to a nicer, richer family with a dog or some shit.'

Wrench glared at him. 'Hell no. We're keeping her.'

'You don't even know what a baby needs! You've never been through something like this!'

"You don't know!" Wrench yelled, causing the baby to scrunch up her face and start to wail.

'Dammit, do you see what you just did?! Now what are you gonna do about it?'

Wrench frowned, looking down at the baby, as if her silent screaming would give him an answer. He suddenly looked up. 'Maybe she's hungry. I'll check online. Watch her for me.' He stepped over the little girl and ran to get their laptop. Numbers stayed, shocked and irritated that he would expect Numbers to sit there and take care of this kid that he didn't even want. Wrench came back with the laptop and sat down, searching the web. Numbers forced him to look up.

'And how do you suppose that I'm going to take care of this baby with you?!'

'Dammit Numbers, I'm working on it! Give her something to play with or something!' Wrench went back to searching the web before Numbers could put in another word. He growled and stomped away to find something for the stupid baby. All the while he mumbled profanities, and threats that probably shouldn't have been said in front of a baby, but Numbers didn't care at the moment. He couldn't find anything that she wouldn't choke on in the family room, so he went to the kitchen. Maybe he could feed her something and she'd shut her mouth? No, she was probably too young to eat anything and Wrench was supposed to figure out if she was even hungry. Maybe she just took a shit and needed to be cleaned? But of course Numbers wasn't going to deal with that, so maybe he should just stay in another room until Wrench complains about the smell. He went through the pantry, looking for something that might help the situation. And he found it.

He came back with some red plastic cups, took them out of their bag, and laid them all in front of the baby. She didn't truly stop her crying, it went down to a whimper, but she did focus on the cups more. She picked on up clumsily, making some other topple down, and then she picked up another. She wiggled a bit, banging the cups together and on the ground, making little noises that consisted of the letter 'B'. She dropped on of them and put the edge of the cup in her mouth, salivating all over it.

Numbers chuckled quietly. "That's kind of cute..."

Wrench looked up from his computer and gasped, taking away the cup. He started picking up the others, keeping them away from her. He glared at Numbers. 'Don't give her plastic! She might get hurt!'

'How the hell is a baby going to get hurt with a fucking cup?'

'She could rip it and swallow a piece.'

Numbers snicked evilly. 'Just wait till she gets her teeth in, she'll be chewing on everything, even our guns.'

'Shut up you dick! You shouldn't have given her plastic!'

The two continued fighting as the baby watched. She grew bored however and rolled onto her belly, attempting to crawl somewhere more interesting. No rooms were actually locked in the house, and most doors were open. She went to the other end of the hall and went into a room that was open just a tiny bit, and the door was light enough for her to push it away. She crawled inside as they continued fighting. Numbers glanced down for a moment and gasped slightly.

'WHERE'S THE BABY?!' 

They searched each other room, looking under tables and couch cushions and even the rugs they had. Numbers then rushed to the artillery room, which was open more than it should have been. He almost screamed, and went to get Wrench.

'SHE HAS A FUCKING GRENADE WRENCH.'

They ran to the room together and stood in the doorway, watching the baby shake the grenade around and put it in her mouth. Wrench grabbed onto Numbers' collar. 'TAKE IT AWAY FROM HER.' Numbers growled, pushing Wrench out of the way, and carefully taking away the grenade. He put it on a high shelf as Wrench picked up the girl.

'That's it. We're not keeping her. She's a threat to us.'

'No, we can't just get rid of her! She's our responsibility now! We're keeping her.'

Numbers swore to himself that he wasn't going to lose this fight. 'What if she gets something worse next time? What if she had set off that grenade? What if-' He stopped signing when Wrench made that pitiful face, that face that always make him melt. He knew he couldn't let Wrench win, because that would only cause trouble, but when he held the baby up to him and snuggled with it, Numbers knew he had lost.

'Fuck you guys. I don't care if you keep her. Just don't let her in that room again, and keep her out of my way.'

"She needs two parents though," Wrench said, since Numbers was walking away and couldn't see him. "She needs a mom, also."

Numbers turned around. 'Fine. I'll be the dad and you can be the mom. There, problem solved.' He didn't bother listening to Wrench complain about how rude he was. He only rolled his eyes and went to get a drink.


End file.
